The 5 Phases of Re-Entry

5 Phases of Re-entry

Re-entry. /ɹi ˈɛntɹi/ n. A return to the United States after a significant time abroad, in which you delight in your home country’s thriving Brunch culture and question if it’s really wise to leave again. 

Re-entry into the United States can be almost as discombobulating as the initial move abroad. You hear talk of “reverse culture shock,” and to an extent it does exist, even coming from a relatively similar country as Spain. It’s less of a total blow, though, and more of a process, a subtle progression. Let’s examine the Five Phases of Re-Entry:

1. Total Confusion

Moments off the airplane and you’re already out of it. People are adeptly speaking a foreign language that you’ve tried and failed to teach for months, called English. Why are the TSA workers patting your crotch? You notice quite the variety of riders on the subway. In Spain there was White Spanish and Hairy Spanish, but in these U.S. cities there appears to be pale, tan, dark, white, black, Chinese, Korean, Mexican, Indian, I’m even hearing some South Africans speak in the far corner. Wait one minute, is it even called the subway? Or is it the metro, or the underground? You’ve gotten so Euro.

2. Unleash the Crazy with American Products

Second lunches and snack-time burritos are now a thing, because you can’t possibly choose between the array of foods that you haven’t seen in nine months. You forgot that Thai was even a cuisine, and to make it up to poor Thai food, you’ll have to order it for an after-dinner digestif. You’ll enter superstores like Target and gaze at pillowcases and brands of gum for hours, and realize that in the time it took you to choose a mark of deodorant, a red-eye could have had you back to Spain.

3. Reverse Culture Shock

Spain falls into the category of Relatively Similar to the U.S. I’m saying they don’t consume dog meat, everyone has Smartphones, and people hit their brakes at red lights. But still, some things will get to you upon re-entry. Why is everyone carrying to-go coffee cups? (And why are they filled with dirt-water?) People are wolfing down Panera bread bowls at tragic tables for one. You’ll actually get ID-ed for your beer, and they’ll stare at your birth date like you faked the digits. Your Toyota Corolla is now the smallest car on the highway, but who cares, because gas in the U.S.—while a toxic and fleeting resource—is a third of the price that it is in Europe. So fuel up!

4. Comment on the Differences

At first your observations are deeply insightful, or at least comment-worthy. It should be brought to everyone’s attention that a glass of mediocre Spanish wine has a 700% markup in the States. And you must know, in Spain we wouldn’t be eating dinner this early. But then you become insufferable. Even your own mother can’t hide her indifference when you inform her that Spanish buses DON’T require exact change—can you believe that?!?—or that you find it so weird that U.S. dollar bills are all one size and color. It’s truly astonishing, until she sweetly brings to your attention, that NO it is NOT.

It’s not weird that countries do things slightly differently. That’s why they’re different countries. What’s weird is that, while you’re spouting off every paltry observation, you’re somehow oblivious to the fact that everyone else is inching away.

5. Become Homesick at Home

All in all, you killed it in Spain. Sure, there were some hard times. But it’s only natural that you had a few tough months during your first year in the real world, because not only did you launch your New Adult Self, but you chose to debut 6,000 miles away. And you’re excited to go back and be that exotic, foreign version of You, this time in the beating metropolis of Barcelona. Who wouldn’t be jealous?

Except that you’re home. You’re waking up in your childhood bed, there’s a blueberry crisp on your counter, you’re back to being your mom’s hiking buddy. 90% of your high school and college friends live within a 20-mile radius.

And you find that, even though you’re at home, you’re already getting homesick in anticipation of your departure. You have two months here, and you know you’ll soon run out of cultural differences to comment on, or go bankrupt from buying heavily marked-up Spanish wine. But my God, you forgot how amazing this place is.

You like to hate on America (lovingly) while you’re gone—our health care is messed up; we have gaping holes in our public transportation; our environmental practices are cringeworthy—but then you come back here.

To a population so relentlessly friendly that you think Americans’ lips are actually semi-bent into permanent smiles.

To the San Francisco Bay Area’s natural beauty, unparalleled in most global corners (because you’ve traveled to some of those corners, and you can vouch).

To movie theaters that play undubbed films.

To cafés where you can sit alone and write all day, without locals questioning why you’re friendless and single.

And you sigh, because although you can’t wait to brag that you live in Barcelona, you already feel the renewed ache of homesickness.

Reunited with college friends.

Reunited with college friends.

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  • Ryan Zieman

    Jenny, I can definitely relate. After 10 months in Madrid I found myself calling the CTA ‘the metro,’ mixing up bills of different US denominations, and thinking that 1am is a perfectly good time to go out. I feared that I would grapple with culture shock as badly as when I arrived in Spain, but luckily it wasn’t anything catastrophic. Like you’ve said, it’s just noticing little things like the (unnecessarily) large cereal aisle in any major grocery store. How I’m longing though for inexpensive Spanish wine, long-winded meals out on a terraza, and just speaking Spanish (I’m afraid of forgetting it all!). Soon enough we will both be back in España ;)

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  • I don’t live in a foreign country (just New York City!) but when I go home to Boston I’m constantly comparing the two. Like, what do you mean I can’t order an iced coffee to be delivered to me? Why am I being kicked out of the bar at 1:00AM? Why are we the only party dining in the restaurant at 10PM on a Friday night?

  • Hahaha love this. My serious confusion comes with not speaking German at supermarkets or with passerbys, like saying “Entschuldigung” when I bump into a person.

    Now, whichever way I’m flying feels like I’m going home, which is a pretty darn cool feeling if I do say so myself. The US still seems weirder though, since more time is spent here, but I still love all the weirdness and fill my suitcase full of it!

    • Jenny

      HA! So true about Entschuldigung, or in my case, “Perdona!” A strange one I’m actually struggling with is the difference in Spanish in California. If I find myself speaking with someone from Mexico or El Salvador, as has been the case recently, I am hyper aware of my Spanish lisp, the fact that I say “vale” instead of “ok,” and I’m terrified I’ll show disrespect by not using Usted (which they hardly ever use in Spain, so I’ve forgotten all the conjugations).
      That’s awesome that home is where you are. I hope to feel that this coming year in Barcelona.

    • HA! So true about Entschuldigung, or in my case, “Perdona!” A strange one I’m actually struggling with is the difference in Spanish in California. If I find myself speaking with someone from Mexico or El Salvador, as has been the case recently, I am hyper aware of my Spanish lisp, the fact that I say “vale” instead of “ok,” and I’m terrified I’ll show disrespect by not using Usted (which they hardly ever use in Spain, so I’ve forgotten all the conjugations).
      That’s awesome that home is where you are. I hope to feel that this coming year in Barcelona.

  • This is great! The biggest adjustment for me after living in Spain for a couple months was the timing. You get used to eating at midnight and going out afterwards. Then to come back to the US and bars close at 2am. What gives?

    • Jenny

      I know!! I always complain about the lateness when I’m in Spain. But the other night I was at a bar in SF and they started kicking us out at 1.30!! I was like….you just made me fork over 9 bucks for a beer, I’m staying till 5 a.m.

    • I know!! I always complain about the lateness when I’m in Spain. But the other night I was at a bar in SF and they started kicking us out at 1.30!! I was like….you just made me fork over 9 bucks for a beer, I’m staying till 5 a.m.

  • Karisa Blake

    Excellent! I completely relate to this! After a year in Thailand I came back to the US and it was an exercise in extremes. First I gorged myself on Olive Garden Bread sticks and Mexican food whenever possible and took way too many trips to Target! lol I also loved pointing out the differences between Southeast Asia and America. “Seriously, this huge water bottle would be 50 cents in Thailand and it’s $4 here!” The last 5 months were just depressing though. I overstayed my welcome and missed life abroad too much. Luckily, as of this week, I’m back in Asia! <3

    • Hahah, I’m discovering I’m the only American who hasn’t tried Olive Garden! I’ll have to fit that, as well as 800 trips to Target, in while I’m home. I sort of hope I feel like I’ve overstayed my welcome by mid-August, so I’m excited to go back to Spain….as of now I’m a little too content being home.

  • Francesca

    Love this, Jenny! I also love that you haven’t taken on a condescending, I’m-better-than-all-of-you-fat-gun-wielding-Americans-because-now-I’m-an-expat attitude. As much as I love to travel around the world, I also love to come home.

    • Thanks Francesca! The longer I’m out of the U.S., the more I begin to remember its pros and forget about its cons. Which I couldn’t have said two years ago. But man, it really is good to come home.

  • Sigh, I can definitely relate to this! I’ve combated the boredom of being home by moving to Australia, but I still miss Spain every day!

  • There is SO. MUCH. peanut. butter. I completely agree with all of this. Blueberry crisp, yessss!

    • Jenny

      Hahah I didn’t notice the peanut butter! I guess I ate a lot of it in Spain too. . . Lidl’s where it’s at, under 3 euros a jar!

  • Girl #5 I feel you! I’m scared I won’t want to leave the states, even with the tempting life I could live in Madrid. Home will probably be “everything”. Your blog looks amaze btw! Good work :)

    • Jenny

      Thanks guapa! And yes, that fear is my number one struggle right now….but hopefully at the end of a long summer I’ll be ready to depart again.

  • When I came back home from Korea and heard English (all of the time) it was strange to me that I could understand everything being said. Also, the diversity here in NYC made me feel more comfortable and at ease, it was nice not being stared at for a change. Great post Jenny :D

    • Jenny

      I think one of the U.S.’s strongest selling points is how diverse it is—it’s so nice to live among such a blend of cultures, and I definitely missed that in Spain.